Getting Through Grief: You're Not Alone in This

Loss hits us all differently. Maybe you've lost someone you love, or a job that felt like part of your identity. Maybe a dream you'd been holding onto just... didn't work out. Whatever it is, grief hurts. And that's okay.

Here's the thing: we're all going to face grief at some point. How you handle it might look completely different from how your best friend or your sibling does—and that's normal. While there's no magic formula for "getting over it," there are things that can help. Let's talk about what grief actually looks like and how to take care of yourself (or someone you care about) through it.

What Grief Actually Feels Like

You've probably heard about the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. But real life isn't that neat. You might skip a stage entirely, bounce between them, or experience them all at once. Still, knowing what these feelings are can help you make sense of what's happening inside you.

Denial: At first, it might not feel real. You're numb, in shock, maybe waiting to wake up from a bad dream.

Anger: Once reality starts sinking in, you might feel furious—at the universe, at the person you lost, at yourself, or at nothing specific at all.

Bargaining: This is when your brain starts playing the "what if" game. "What if I'd done something differently?" "If I could just go back..."

Depression: The heaviness sets in. Getting out of bed feels impossible. Things you used to love don't bring you joy anymore.

Acceptance: Eventually—and this takes time—you start to make peace with your new reality. You'll still have hard days, but you can also start to see a path forward.

Actually Helpful Ways to Cope

So what can you do when you're in the thick of it? Here are some things that genuinely help:

Talk to someone who knows what they're doing. A therapist isn't going to judge you or tell you to "just get over it." They're trained to help you work through these feelings at your own pace.

Find your people. Support groups connect you with others who really get it—because they've been there too. Sometimes just knowing you're not alone makes all the difference.

Don't forget about yourself. I know—when you're grieving, self-care feels like the last thing on your mind. But try to sleep, eat something nutritious, and move your body a little. Journaling, meditation, or yoga might help too, if you're into that sort of thing.

How to Be There for Someone Who's Grieving

If someone in your life is going through this, you might feel helpless. You probably are wondering what to say. Here's what actually helps:

Just listen. Don't try to fix it or find the silver lining. Let them talk, cry, or sit in silence. Your job isn't to make it better—it's just to be there.

Do something practical. Show up with groceries, offer to walk their dog, or text "I'm doing a Target run, what do you need?" Grief makes even simple tasks feel overwhelming.

Keep showing up. A week after the funeral, everyone disappears. But grief doesn't work that way. Check in next month. And the month after that. Keep reminding them you're still there.

Moving Forward (In Your Own Time)

Grief is part of being human. It doesn't mean something's wrong with you, and it doesn't have to define the rest of your story. Understanding what you're going through, taking care of yourself, and leaning on others when you need to—these things help.

Most importantly, give yourself permission to grieve in whatever way feels right for you. There's no timeline, no "right way" to do this. Be patient with yourself. You're doing better than you think.